update...

So I know I haven't updated this page in forever, I've been so busy with school its crazy, life in general has been nuts. I've just been trying to soak in so much, change and do as much studying as I can, I mean I will only get one chance in my life to study like this, so why not go crazy.

The books we've been studying in week or so have been 1&2Thess, Colossians, Philippians, and Philemon. It has been great to study these books, some have been more fruitful than others but my eyes have been open to the scriptures in ways they never have been before, it feels like I'm reading these books for the first time, though most I've read like 5 times before.

Something God has really been showing me, now and the last couple of months, the importance of becoming smaller and smaller so he can become bigger and bigger. And I believe the American mindset is something that hinders people from thinking like this, this is something I don't really want to get into to, but basically 'boo american dream' and 'yay the kingdom of God'

The other night I was laying in my bed and the next day we where having this 'future job' night at our local coffee bar so I was thinking about what I wanted to be. I never really had any real ambitions as a kid so I kinda had to think of something, seeing as I'm already doing what I know I'll be doing for the rest of my life. I thought about the future, and It was weird, being an american it has told me that I need to be rich to amount to anything, but yet I imagined me growing a garden in the middle of a slum. Wow. what happened?! Who thinks this?

In the book of 1Thess the text shows (when you look back at Acts 17) because of the situation going on they really had nothing but Jesus and I'm comfortably saying thats I have anymore, all my secrets are exposed, all my plans/desires have been let go of. I find my life has been ruined for Jesus and the odd part is that I'm not upset about that at all.

I've been trying to hard to make my life less about me, but the more I do so, the more I realize the selfishness of my own heart and actions and honesty its sickening. I wish to lay more and more of myself. This is basically all that's been running through my mind as of late, more stuff too, but trying to censer myself until I figure out the right words. I love you all!